More updates...

More updates...

Mum's walking about already.

Bandage taken off. Scar looks clean and neat.

Will probably get discharged coming Wednesday.

Just took her bath since her operation. Bathed with my help. I washed her hair yesterday and shampooed it today. Helped her dry herself and wear on her clothes.

Wonder if I injured my back while bending down to help her as the toilet was a little cramp and i told her to support herself on me. So I was being pressed down while I was bending down to help her wear her pants. I feel a little pull on my back now.

Laogong says that I didn't update anything about him and he's getting jealous. So, here's what I'll post about him. Laogong laogong laogong. Thanks for the small hamper. You lied to me again about getting the ward number and room number to buy 4d. Grr! But on behalf of my parents, thank you again. Pleasant surprise.

1 week break. It will be intensive taking care of mummy. Going down to SGH tomorrow again.

It's a good day

Mum's doing very well and good. She's already in normal ward. She didn't even stay in high dependency for one complete day. She went there at 6pm yesterday and transferred out at 3pm today already. She's so much better looking now and is to her usual self already, that is, irritating the nurses. My dad sometimes keep laughing at my mum at how she can disturb the doctors and the nurses. Definitely not your usual type of patients.

It is also the last day of my practicum. My kids are so sweet. Especially my P5 darlings. They made a card for me and everyone signed the card. Apart from that, they gave me personal notes or letters (whatever you call them) and presents. They were all very sweet and all wishing that I didn't have to go. 5 weeks came and went. Within this 5 weeks, I've learnt a lot, honestly, much more than what was covered in NIE. Within 5 weeks, I've won over the children's hearts. I didn't expect to be able to accomplish all these in this short time.

I guess.. It's a good day after the past few days of worry. There will be no rainbow if there is no rain and sun. It's all worth it.

Updates on Mummy's Condition..

9.30am

Dad called. He say that the breathing tube has been removed. He went into mummy's ICU room and talked to her. Her period came, what a timing! Luckily the nurses are taking care of it well and keeping up with good hygiene is number one to them. Mum also complained of throat pain and chest pain, the part that was operated.


7.30pm.

I am so happy to see mummy. I just wanted to go up to her and hug. Unfortunately, I can't do that. The nurse allowed daddy and I to enter her room. We had to wash our hands first. Talked to mummy, told her about school today and she laughed a little. When I went close to her, my heart really ached so bad. So many injections and tubes attached to her. Her neck, arm, chest. It's definitely not a pleasant sight. Mum was in a sitting position and her eyes kept closing. She's feeling very weak. Dad said they made mum sleepy so that she will sleep and not think of the pain. They had doubled her morphine dosage and yet she is still in pain. Sigh. According to mum, the physiotherapist came earlier on to help her in some breathing exercises. Mum also ate dinner. They fed her porridge and some watermelon. That's good. She told me time passes by really slow. It's a torture. Had to stop myself from crying again. I hope mum can be transferred out of ICU soon.

So many relatives came, and mum wasn't really happy about it as she wouldn't want them to see her like this. They don't understand what it means to come after she's out of ICU. For the closer relatives, we are ok with them coming. But those who are not that close, seriously, what is the point of coming down? We also don't let them in. Daddy and I only allowed them to see from outside.

Mummy's condition aside, my day went quite ok. I had a debriefing about yesterday's lesson with Sharon. It was agreed that my classroom management skills in that class, sucks. But she agrees that my passion is there. Both Belle and her think that I am suited for this line.

I told my P3 and P5 students that this Friday is going to be my last day there. The P3s were not too attached to me and so it didn't make much difference to them. Anyway, they've had many NIE teachers attached to their class before. My P5s were the ones who really touched my heart. They reacted really strongly and voiced out that they didn't want me to go. They shouted "not fair!". I told them I have to continue my training. They said they will tell Belle to write in to tell them not to ask me to go. After lesson, a group of them, with students from another P5 class surround me as I was about to go home. They asked if I really had to go and they understood in the end that I am here for training. I may or may not get posted back. They were very relunctant to say goodbye. The thing is, the other students from another class, I have not taught them before and even they didn't want me to go. Wow. They finally said that they feel that I am pretty and really hope that I really come back again. I hope too. I'll miss them.

Mummy!!

I really admire my mum. She's really one of the strongest woman I know. With her heart condition, of 4 holes in her heart, she gave birth to my brother and I, naturally. She went through the pains without any complications. It was only after giving birth to my brother that she went through the first operation. I was very young back then and I can't really recall much. I can only remember that my dad kept travelling to and fro from the hospital, and that my brother and I couldn't see my mum as we were not allowed to entre the ICU.

Now, 14 years later, she just went through another operation. A transplant of a human valve. Everyone's so worried and scared except her. Maybe she has learnt to accept her condition. But I believe my mum is strong. Nothing will bring her down. Her operation was delayed by about 3 hours because they couldn't find a vein at her neck. Dad and I waited outside the operating theatre for quite some time. Finally at about 7pm, they brought her out. My brother and I were having dinner and we ran up. You can't imagine how relieved I felt. Since I said good night to my mum last night, I've been crying on and off. The amount of worry and tension. No one had a good sleep, except my mum, according to my dad. Throughout the day in school, I had to make myself busy with work if not my eyes will go teary. At home, I had to be strong for my dad. I could see that his eyes were red too. Finally, when I saw my mum, it was relieve yet heartache. Tears of joy and relieve, mixed with heartache. All those machines and tubes attached to her and down her throat. My relatives came and saw my mum too. We talked to the nurses and they predicted 4-6 hours before she'll wake up. Dad was so worried he actually held my hand, really tight.

7.30pm. Mum's moving her limbs! We were happy, at least my mum shows signs of movement. Nurses were really good and took very good care of her.

8.15pm. Mum opened her eyes! So much earlier than expected. She could respond a little to the nurses. Thank God!

9.00pm. We were about to go back and so we went to look in on mum again. She not only opened her eyes, but she waved at us and gave us the thumbs up! Wow. Within 2 hours after her surgery. This time it was purely tears of joy. Daddy was very happy too. I hope that he can have a good night's sleep today.

Mummy never onced complained about her condition and never once showed us that she was weak emotionally. She perservered. She knows we are there for her. I really have to thank God for watching over her. Thank all my friends and everyone who prayed for her. Thank laogong for supporting me. Thank Chris for all her concern.

The next 24 hours is still critical and nurses are keeping watch on her every second. Mum's still on the ventilator until she is fully awake, before they will remove that. That will be the next hurdle. Mum looks really pale now but she's still herself. Heard from my dad that up till before the operation, she was joking with the doctors.

Anyway, for friends who wish to visit, do not come yet. When she's done with the ICU and high dependency unit and in normal ward, I'll let you know. I want to thank everyone for the concern. It helps knowing that you guys care.

I need your prayers

Mum's admitted in hospital already. Spent most of my afternoon there. We attended a short video on pre-operation procedures and it scared the hell out of me, on the kind of things they will be stuffing down my mum's throat and such to help her breathe. She says that she's prepared and isn't scared. I am. Maybe it is just a strong front that she's putting up, I don't know. Her operation is scheduled at 11am tomorrow morning. Dad will be there about the first hour I guess. I want to be there too, but I have school tomorrow and also under observation.

My observation went well today. Both my CT and NIE Supervisor were impressed and found my lesson interesting. My students too enjoyed the lesson and were very engaged. I've got a lesson on volume and capacity tomorrow with my P3 kids and I bet they'll enjoy it too. They get to play with water!

This prayer is for my mum

God, please protect my mum.

Be with her always and let her know that you are there with her too.

Be her strength and her hope.

I am entrusting her in your hands and I know you love her as your own.

Lord, help me too to be strong for my mum.

To support her when she needs it.

To give me the strength to take care of her and my family.

Watch over my dad too as he is aging and yet he has to take care of her.

Let him have enough trust in me so let me take over whenever he is tired.

Lord, nothing else means more to me than family and loved ones.

Please watch over all of us during this tough period.

I beseech you and thank you for all these.

I want my sleep!

I am so tired. It's nearly 2am and I just finished another lesson plan. I am trying to finish all my lesson plans by tomorrow so that I can don't think too much about it as mum is in hospital, and I think I will spend a lot of time there. Where to find the time to do the lesson plan?

Anyway I was so angry with my student today. She keeps giving me attitude problem. Today's the last straw that I could tolerate. She told me that it doesn't matter to her whether she pass or fail. So I said, nevermind, in that case, you are on your own. Really made my blood boil.

Got to work tomorrow again. Urgh! Not enough sleep!!!!!!

Nuts

When I woke up, early this morning, while I was washing my face, I looked into the mirror. I got a shock. My right eye was bloodshot red. Panic. Took my bathe, and looked into the mirror again. It was still there. My left eye wasn't playing any tricks on me. Thoughts came to me. How am I going to teach today with one eye red? But I cannot don't teach because today I am bringing them to the computer lab and they are so much looking forward to it. Also, it is my first formal observation by my CT. Immediately, I went to drop some eye drop. Helped a tiny bit, the redness lessened by 10%. The thing is, this sore eye, is neither itchy nor pain. Nevertheless, I went to school. Luckily, not many people noticed, so it means, the redness was clearing.

Now, it has spread to the other side, but just faint red, on both eyes. And probably because I was on heels the whole day today, my ankle is starting to hurt again. Sheesh.

Anyway, my lesson observation feedback received was that, for an inexperienced teacher, I did well but definitely, there's still room for improvement. I hope that Monday's lesson goes well. End of week 4 of practicum. One more week left. It's gonna be a long week for me.

Monday - 2 observations in a lesson. One by CT, one by NIE supervisor. English P5. Future Tense.
Tuesday - 1 observation. By CT. Maths P3. Volume. Introduction activity.
Wednesday - 1 observation. By CT. Science P5. Simple machines.

Mummy's going into hospital on Monday and her operation is scheduled on Tuesday. So many things going on. Dad's on leave the whole week to take care of mummy. I gotta do more housework already too. Many lesson plans are not done yet too. I'm going nuts.

Sigh

Things don't seem to be going right for me. This morning, as I walk into the staff room, I got arrowed to do relief again. It's almost everyday. Grr, luckily, Wesley said that that was his class and he would like to take over my relief period. We told the adminstration staff and he stroke off my name. 5 minutes later, he gave me another relief for another class. Grrrr!!! Feel like complaining. Relief once in a while is ok, but not everyday.

Maths lesson was ok, but something is wrong with the P3 class today. They were all so slow in movement and nearly 1/4 of the class didn't do homework. P5 Science class was one huge mess again! Lesson was on levers, and I think they ended up more confused. Sometimes I wonder, am I really cut out to be a teacher? I have to fine tune my next lesson and touch up on certain areas that were not really covered well today.

After school, I was walking home and I slipped and slided a little. Fortunately, I didn't fall. But, I sprained my ankle. I was only halfway through home and I had to tolerate the pain. Just last week, I pulled a muscle on my ankle and today sprained.. the same ankle! What luck.

Well, and as usual, I always hit my knee cap against my keyboard drawer as I was climbing out of my sofa. This happens too often that I think its an everyday affair.

Finished another lesson plan and friday's powerpoint presentation. Hope Friday's lesson will be much better. Will be doing revision for the next 2 days, for my P3 maths class as they are having common test next week.

Headache AGAIN...

I'm getting lazy to update my blog. It aint good, because I know it will soon become an update a week, to a month, to two months, to 6 months, and by that, I probably have forgotten my link to my blog. No no, I must continue updating my blog, at least once in 2 days.

Anyway, those trainee teachers around me are all starting to fall sick. Adrian has a very bad case of sore throat and flu, Lakshmi I think is also having flu and Wesley is coming down with a bad throat too. And today, I've just experienced another bout of headache. It was so bad I left school straight at 1pm to go home to rest. After having lunch and cooling myself down, the pain was still there. I went to sleep for 2 hours and it didn't help. Finally, I decided to take panadol. And up till now, I still feel a little pain. I think it must be the weather, its so tempermental and probably the lack of sleep too.

School's going fine and fun. It's racial harmony day this Friday and I wonder if I should borrow a punjabi suit from Lakshmi to wear it on Friday. My English lessons for this and next week, I believe, are going to be a hit! They'll have lessons in the computer lab and the library. They get to do lots of hands-on and be writers of a magazine publishing company. As for Maths, the kids are going to get to play with water in learning about volume. Science, they will do a peer teaching. It's gonna be cool and it's gonna wear me out. But I am enjoying it nonetheless. Nothing beats seeing that they learnt and have enjoyed the lesson. I hope all goes well.

It's a bargain!

Went to my favourite place again. Bugis! Can never get enough of it. And yes, Bugis = Shopping and these are what laogong and I bought.

Me:

• Earphone + Mic ($12.90)
• Ink cartridge ($9)
• 4 pairs of earrings ($4)
• A pair of shoes... very cute!! ($9.90)
• A wallet ($20.80)
• OP Skirt ($10)

Laogong:

• 2 shirts ($30)
• A logitech keyboard + mouse.. for his sis ($29.90)

And so you see, I am proud of myself for getting things at a bargain! I am so excited. Gonna pack my new wallet now. I like it. It's pink! Bought it from wallet shop.

Here's what I've discovered

I've realized some similiarities among teachers...

• Get hungry easily (too much energy needed)
• Tend to speak loudly (occupational side effects)
• Get sore throat easily (occupational hazard)
• Good at staring (on the job training)
• Multi-taskers (carry on the lesson will looking out for problematic students)

Yeah! Done with week 3 of practicum. How fast time flies. Another 2 more weeks to go. I think I really enjoy teaching.

Drained again

I am so tired again, I think I will fall asleep very soon. Stayed in school till 3+pm and then went to Yishun and then to Jurong East. Had to rush to and fro today. My NIE supervisor had a long talk with us and so I couldn't take a train down and had to take a cab. Because I was late for that, I ended late and ended up being late for piano class and so I took a cab too. It was costly. Fasting for the next few days already. I have to budget myself.

Today's Science lesson was being filmed by my CT. It was really a good experience to handle a lab session with the class. I learnt that I cannot squeeze too many activities for a primary level. They need a lot of supervision. My CT thought it was much better than the grammar class on Monday and I admit, it is. Think I will view the video tomorrow.

My other CT also said that my lesson plan's good and say that I helped create links so that the students can understand why we learn a certain topic. My NIE supervisor also had a look at my practicum file. She kept praising me about it too. It's been a rather good day.

Well, I've got a stack of worksheets to mark now. More books to mark in school too.

Hmmm....

My primary 3 students are sucking the blood out of me. Probably because of the class size. In class, they are little devils, complaining at every small little itsy bitsy thing and when your back is to them, they start opening their mouth and when you turn back to face them, it's shut. But they are cute outside class. I guess kids will be kids. Maybe I have been to harsh on them.

Mum's home now. Resting. She's given mc till friday. I think she's planning to go back to work on Friday, or maybe not. Her operation's confirmed already. God bless my mum.

Tomorrow is gonna be a super long day. School in the morning, stay back for staff meeting, gonna go for my hair treatment, attend my piano class, and possibly meet laogong for dinner. I think I'll just lie flat on my bed tomorrow. No wonder teachers theorectically work only half day. Because teaching for half a day will already drain out every single inch of energy off us. Haha, but it is still a rewarding career. Up till now, no regrets.

Was talking to twinnie just now on msn and she told me that she prefers NIE life. Well, I guess to a certain extent, yes, it is more slack, at least we don't have to get up so early and we sleep during lectures. Maybe this is me. Teaching has always been something I want to do, and now when I really get to do it, I am enjoying every single draining energy moment.

A little disappointment in myself

Mum's alright, just a little immobile now due to the wound but nothing serious. Doctor gave the all clear signal to have the operation already. She'll be admitted again on the 24th july and have the operation on the 25th july. More details will only be known tomorrow when her doctor comes in to see her again. Pray that everything goes well.

I am so disappointed with myself today. My English lesson was a disaster. I think I left my students with more question marks than any other thing. I think I will have to reteach this topic. This time, I have a more structured view already. My Maths lesson was ok, but I think that there are too many pupils in the class and so it got rowdy. I really shouted at them and punished them, but not too long, don't want it deemed to be coporal punishment. I hope tomorrow's Maths lesson will go well. First 2 periods. I have to do something about classroom management and maintaining discipline.

I'm tired and I'm sleepy. Think I will have an early night.

Mum's in Hospital

Mum's in hospital for angiogram. She'll be awake throughout the whole procedure while they cut a small slit near her groin and insert a tube upwards, to do what, I also don't know. Local anethesia (not sure of the spelling =X ). I will be going down again tomorrow. Lucky mum's in class A ward, so she has a whole room to herself. But the room looks very drap and dull. Lucky it is just a few days.

I am tired. After visiting mum at the hospital, went down to bugis with laogong to find for present for his elder sis's birthday tomorrow. While we were there, laogong surprised me by asking whether I wanted to take picture at those lovegety. So here's one of the 2 shots. The other is with him and I can't scan it in. But I like the one I kept. I think I smiled pretty nicely.


Ok, big day tomorrow at school. Got a few classes to teach and I better go get my beauty sleep. Another 6 hours and I gotta be crawling out of bed again. *groans*

Drained

Have not updated for the last 2 nights. I was so tired, I just knocked out and forgot to updated my blog. Practicum is finally getting into full swing. I have already started doing my lesson planning and worksheet designing. My enthusiasm is still running high.

Well, I was told by my CT that her class enjoyed my lesson. To quote the students' exact words "She (referring to me) can handle it!" I was quite happy and encouraged to continue to want to do better. I am motivated.

I can feel that I am coming down with a sore throat already. I guess it is because of those relief classes that I have been doing and some last minute lessons I have to teach because of teachers being involved in external validation. Well, I had better down myself with cooling herbal tea and lots of plain water. I've got lessons to teach next week and I cannot afford to lose my voice now. I've bought my materials already.

Ok, I'm mentally drained again. Just finished another lesson plan. Gotta sleep soon if not I'll be like a dead flower in work tomorrow.

Surge of Emotions

One big news. My mum's going for a major heart operation. Doctor says 95% success rate, but I can't help but worry. How I wish I was 6 years old again. Mum was supposed to go for an operation next year, but due to unforseen circumstances and the sudden swelling of her heart, she is going for operation this month! Tentatively, 24th July. In case you are wondering why, my mum has not 1, but 4 holes in her heart. This is going to be her second operation. Her first was when I was 6, and I didn't really know what was going on. Now that I've grown up, I worry and hope everything goes well. However, she's getting admitted this sunday so that doctors can run some tests on her before the operation and will only probably be discharged on Tuesday.

I have this sudden urge to protect my parents. To help them out in all the housework and let them enjoy and relax when they come home. To support them so that they no need to work. But till now, it is still beyond my limitations. I don't earn enough to support everything yet. And my work is piling up already and I don't want to overwork myself. The only thing I can do now is to do more housework but not all, yet. Why am I thinking like this? Am I finally growing up? Maybe it is the working world that I am in now, I begin to see more and understand more.

Sadly, why can't my brother just grow up?! Can't he see that my parents are sad that he is no longer spending time with them? He's rude to everyone else around him too. He's in his own little world, whereby only 2 people exist. He and his girlfriend. Everyone else is servicing him. When will he ever learn? I'm on the brink of giving him a piece of my mine. I know my mum has already told him off. My dad's going to have a talk with my brother soon. Don't know if it'll work but I hope it does. If not, I will just wash my hands off him. I won't give face to him or his girlfriend the next time I see them.

On a happier note, I am glad that my students enjoy my lesson. I did a half hour english lesson yesterday with them to do corrections for their comprehension. Today, a girl, who stays at the same block as me walked home with me. We talked on the way and she told me that she's looking forward to my lessons. When I didn't come in to teach today, they thought that I won't be teaching them anymore. I guess I've started my career on a right foot. I am enjoying every single minute of it.

As I end off, I would like to ask you that if it is possible, could you help me pray for my mum and that she recovers fast? Thanks if you could.

Joke

Here's a joke within a couple.

Have you ever wondered why women in a relationship must constantly hear the men say "I love you" and that men has no need to hear it? Well it's because women express and show their feelings and the men feels it. But men seldom show it. So, one day...

Wife: Do you love me?
Husband: Yes.

And so she decided to push her luck.
Wife: Will you die for me?
Husband: No.

He continues...
Husband: Because my love for you is an undying love.

Discipline

Boy must I say that I am proud of myself today. I managed to pull myself up to go for the medical review at Raffles Hospital. Wow. Well, I planned on taking the bus. I waited a good whole 25 minutes for it and when it came, the bus was so packed, no one at my bus stop could board the bus. Pissed, I took a cab down. The cab driver was so nice. I had a $50 and a $10 note in my wallet. The cab fare was $11.30. I took out the $50 note but he had no change. He said $10 was fine and took it. No complaints.

I was put on the priority list at Raffles Hospital. It was fast. Within 15 minutes I was out of the place and then I went back. Review again in 1 year time. On my way home, I stopped by the clinic near my block to make an appointment with the dentist. And now, I have nice, clean teeth. But the dentist is asking me to extract my wisdom tooth. It will cost $100. No operation needed. Just simple extraction. Sheesh. Money money money.

I feel so relieved now. Done with the medical review and my trip to the dentist. There I did it. I was so skeptical of myself last night before I slept. I told myself I know that I will definitely avoid the dentist or the medical review or maybe even both and just stay home to sleep and slack, since for the next few weeks, there won't be a break for me. I've just proven myself wrong. Accomplishment!

Another day of hardcore gaming

If I were to tell anyone who knows that I game hardcore that I am a teacher, I bet he/she won't believe. If I were to tell my students their teacher plays online gaming, I bet 100% that they won't believe either. Why? Because I can't believe it either. But that's what I did today. My character is finally level 28! 3 levels in 2 days. Quite a lot for me.

Anyway, think I will be going down to Raffles Hospital tomorrow for my medical review. And maybe if there is an availabe slot at the dentist in the afternoon, I will go. Get it over and done with. Since tomorrow is Youth Day, and will be the only time left for me to do all these necessary things. Been dragging it for too long already.

My parents and I are getting very pissed off with my brother. He doesn't hold anyone in respect and my mum is very angry with him. Unfortunately, after scolding him, he still doesn't listen. What can we do?

Relaxed

There is no work today
Gaming is all I did
Since morning I got up from the bed I lay
How I wish back to the time I was a kid

Poetic today. Haha. Tired now. Good night.